At least the submitter isn't from Florida

I'm sorry. Are they kidding me with today's strip? Who cares if the doctor has old magazines in the waiting room as long as his practice is up-to-date? Though, really, judging from the not-surprising lack of computers in the office, I somehow doubt he's totally up-to-date, despite the jargon that Nurse Nulla is using. (And "internal dandruff elimination"? I get the feeling we're supposed to find stuff like that funny. Al? I don't.) But if we go strictly on the premise--the doctor is totally cutting edge, but only has old magazines in the waiting room--is that amusing? I guess. I'm just annoyed with the execution.

Also, I don't have much sympathy for people who come to a place where they pretty much know they'll have to sit around for a while and yet inexplicably don't bring along anything to do. Old magazines in the waiting room is pretty standard fodder for complaints. People know this will be an issue. The answer isn't to complain; it's to bring a book with you. Honestly, people it's not that hard.

I do admit that seeing 2001 and 2002 being acknowledged as a while ago threw me off a bit. Chances that Al initially wrote 1961 and 1962? Pretty good.

And a heads' up: I'm going out of town tomorrow, and probably won't get a chance to update again until Monday.

Migratory complaints

I'm not entirely sure I understand today's strip, although I do see that it was submitted by a cranky Florida reader. If they're not careful, they're going to get their own tag. My biggest point of confusion is whether the Arfo and Elpie own two homes--one in the south and one in the north. The expo box isn't sure ("To visit old friends or what?"), and she says that they come up every year. If they're staying with friends, that is a bit obnoxious. But if they have a place to stay, what's the big deal? It seems logical that a couple might want to go south in the winter, and north in the summer. Lots of retirees do it; my grandparents did. And if they came north just for a vacation, is there even an issue here? I guess this might be a "grass is greener" situation.

I only just figured out the "They usta say it's not bad" comment. What the heck is "usta"? Al frequently tries to write things phonetically, but he fails miserably here. "Usta" does not mean "used to." Ever, pretty much. And people who scoff at the "dry heat" comment need to feel what 95 degrees feels like in Arizona, then feel 95 degrees in DC in July. They're very different.

Of course, this doesn't make sense if Arfo and Elpie moved to Florida. You can't say that the heat in Florida is dry. And why is the Florida person complaining? It means that people leave in the summer, which you think would make them happy.

Burger Boss is my fave!

I...kind of don't have much negative to say about today's strip. And God knows I've read enough angry Internet confrontations over the issue of kids in a restaurant that I don't particularly want to stray into it. It upsets me that Al used "Daffina" instead of "Daffia," which he's used before. I hate how he uses these slight modifications to names that don't make any sense to begin with. Also the use of "bistro" when he means "restaurant," because to me, "restaurant" and "bistro" don't necessarily mean the same thing. All bistros are restaurants, but all restaurants aren't bistros.

So...I'm not going to wade into the meat of today's strip, and will instead wish everyone a lovely long weekend.

Also note that she changed skirts in the car

I definitely think that I've seen today's strip before, but I can't find it. I hate when that happens. I just feel like there are so many more ways that people are annoying; it bothers me that we so often just see variations on a theme.

This is one of those ethical dilemmas. Should she go back and say something? Most of us wouldn't. I wouldn't. I admit it. If it was over probably $5 or so, then I'd go back. But $3? Yeah, not so much. And I kind of admire Migraina, in the abstract, for watching the purchases ring up and actually know how much things cost. Mind you, if I were behind her in line, I'd probably hand her a dime myself and tell her to shut up. (OK, I'd want to, but I wouldn't actually do it.) So...maybe not something they'll do every time, but something I can relate to. Because I, apparently, am a Bad Person.

And I do need to point out that Migraina is shopping in the 50s. I'll ignore the outfit of the cashier, as everyone seems to wear old-fashioned uniforms in TDIETland. But check out the cash register. I originally was going to posit that the $.10 difference was because Migraina hadn't swiped her discout card, but clearly this place isn't set up to handle such technology.

Now I have a helpful egg cooker!

I'm trying to figure out why it's important in today's strip that Fignewt is retired. It's highlighted in both the expo box and Elpie saying that he needs to get a life (when she actually means he just needs to stop bothering her--which, really, would be what most people would say). I guess we have to assume that when he had a job, he wouldn't hover that way. Probably because he came home and found dinner on the table, as it should be.

I kind of feel bad for Fignewt, though; look at his face in that top panel. He doesn't look demanding or anything, just a bit sad. Aww. Maybe that's why it's important he's retired--he doesn't really feel a sense of purpose in his life, so tries to help out. Sure, what he's saying is annoying, but now I feel bad for him.

Same with the bottom panel. If they'd chosen something other than fried eggs, I might be less sympathetic, but I have major problems with them myself (mostly flipping them, to be honest). And Elpie is just pissing me off. And what's up with the layout of the house--the bedroom open to the kitchen like that? Particularly since it doesn't look that way in the top panel.

I always seem to wind up sympathizing with the wrong person in these things, don't I?

Paging Joan and Melissa Rivers

In today's strip, Al veers into the unfamiliar territory of the celebrity world. The Fug Girls, he's not. He's also a bit redundant--aren't "face unshaved" and "5 o'clock shadow" the same thing? Ditto "hair uncombed and disheveled"? I didn't realize that the scruffy look was the REAL new look. Honestly, some guys just look better with a bit of scruff.

Really, if you're watching the red carpet of some big function (and I assume we're talking Oscars or Emmys here, because below that, it doesn't really matter), and you're getting upset about a guy having some scruff, then either that's the most boring red carpet ever, or you're just not paying attention.

And, to be quite honest, I'm not going to value the fashion opinions of the average TDIET submitter (excepting, of course, those submitters who frequent this site and the Comics Curmudgeon).

Free that kid!

I'm not sure I get today's strip. Well, I get it, in the sense that I see that a fight morphs from being about taking out the garbage to being about something else entirely. And I guess this is a "do it every time" situation, because yeah, that's pretty much how fights go. Once the floodgates are open, anything goes. I guess what I don't understand is why this is even a strip. Are we supposed to think, "How wacky! They started talking about one thing and wound up talking about something else!"? Because...honestly, that's pretty much every conversation. I just feel bad for the kid. This is obviously something he's seen before. He looks like he wishes his parents would just get divorced already.

A couple other notes: Again with the mention of the husband's sister! It's such a recurring theme in this strip that it makes me wonder whether Mrs. Al has issues with Al's sister. And who keeps the garbage can like that in their dining room? Even assuming that the kitchen is on the other side of the cans, that's just a bit too much. Those cans look like they belong outside. And lastly, submitted by "You know who"? No, I don't know who.

TV, hospitals, and more tv

Wednesday's strip makes no sense to me. The basic problem is that if a movie is being aired on television, then it's already out on tape. (And, by the way, Al, most of us buy DVDs nowadays.) If it's on tv and not already released for purchase, then you're probably watching it on pay-per-view or On Demand...and in both cases, you'd be seeing the original uncut version. And if the movie is that bad, then it's probably rated R, which the parents should've noticed. So, no sympathy from me. I do like the replacement use of "You're just a meany--you ol' fuddy duddy." We just don't use the phrase "fuddy-duddy" enough these days.

Yesterday's strip once again takes us to a hospital (although submitted by someone from DC, not Florida, so that's nice). Do hospitals actually provide menus to their patients like this? That would be obnoxious if you were given a choice and didn't get it...but really, is this an actual situation? We don't know why this guy is in the hospital (no IV or bandages), but roast beef, mashed potatoes, pie, coffee, and biscuits (mmm, biscuits) does not sound like something that a hospital would offer to most of its patients. At least there aren't any totally bizarro foods mentioned.

Is it wrong that in today's strip, I'm more interested in the food on the table than in the actual substance of the strip? I didn't think so. I'm just trying to figure out whether that's a fast food bag next to the hamburger and the bottle of ketchup. Or is that soda? Probably soda. Maybe those are fries? I'm not sure. I appreciate the newspaper proclaiming that the ballgam that Arfo wanted to watch was a "big game"--subtle. Nice. Why he's so intent on listening to the news, though, is beyond me. Unless he's making a point about not being able to hear the tv. Situations like this always get me. I assume that Arfo and Migraina have been married for a while. He's sitting about 1 foot from the television. I refuse to believe that he can't just tune out his wife. But I do feel for Arfo. It reminds me of growing up, my dad would insist on having the tv on a certain channel...and then would read a newspaper. But we weren't allowed to change the channel. Typical.

It's all about the aunts

I can't help but sympathize with Migraina in yesterday's strip. I think part of it is that I don't have enough information. Is Aunt Elpina on Migraina's side of the family, or her husband's? Because if it's her husband's side of the family, honestly, he should know. She really should at least know how Aunt Elpina is doing...assuming that she hasn't been in the hospital long. To be frank, though, when my aunt was in and out of the hospital last year, I couldn't tell you what hospital or who her doctor was (and honestly, unless it's local, why should they know?). I generally knew how she was doing, but wouldn't necessarily know how long she would be in for. Yet, like Migraina, could at the same time give details about the lives of television characters ("a bad case of amnesia"?). I guess...that makes me a bad person? I'm not proud that I know as much random television trivia as I do, but that doesn't mean I don't care about my family. Dammit.

In today's strip, we contemplate the empty nest. Which is funny to me, only because today I became an aunt! Yay! That has nothing to do with TDIET, but I'm really excited about it. Honestly, I have really nothing snarky to say about today's strip, to the point where I'll ignore "J'ever". I imagine that is what the house feels like. At least at first. Then you get over it and enjoy not having to deal with those bratty kids. Particularly if you don't have their college to pay for anymore.

More on hospital visitors

Today's strip, not surprisingly, is set in a hospital. And submitted by someone from Florida, if you can believe it. I know! What are the odds?

The submitter does realize that it's not Nurse Nulla's fault he can't have visitors, right? I don't know why someone would be denied any visitors (quarantine?), but I'm pretty sure it's up to the doctors, not the nurses. And I doubt it's so the patient doesn't have to put up with small talk. Really, he broke his leg. I don't see how that precludes visitors.

As for the nurse herself, well, I have mixed feelings. On the one hand, dude, just tell her to leave. "I'd like to take a nap." "I want to read a book." "I think I hear someone calling for you." And so on. And really, she's only trying to keep the guy entertained. (And psst, Al? Walter Cronkite is no longer on the air.) So launch into a debate of whether Apolo Anton Ohno, Joey Fatone, or Laila Ali deserves to win Dancing with the Stars.

I do love "Whatta think of the awful world situation?" Al's getting political!

Hate meter is at 11

There's a very large part of me that doesn't even want to grace today's strip with a response. Blood? It is boiling. M. Edelmeyer should be glad he lives in the Bronx instead of somewhere near me. And Al is going The List too, unless Edelmeyer's email actually read "Ever notice how fat people say they want to lose weight but keep shoving six different desserts into their mouths in one sitting? And then if they think they're going to a class reunion they want people to think they're thin?" Which...okay, he might have actually submitted that. But still.

I'd just like to point out to Edelmeyer that dieting is hard, particularly if you don't have much motivation (and no, a new dress isn't motivation--trust me, tons of women have clothes that they bought that would fit great if they lost 5/10/15/whatever pounds; these clothes are usually never worn). My only complaint with Rotunda (*sigh*) is that she would've realized her class reunion was coming up, so it shouldn't be a "I have 3 weeks!" thing.

Anyway, shut up. I'm not being coherent and thinking about it is pissing me off. Maybe I'm just cranky from my current diet.

(And yes, all of us fat people are fat because we just continually shove desserts into our mouths. That's it exactly. We just can't lay off 20 desserts at once!)

Mmm, achin' bacon

Today's strip is annoying because it's trying to equate two totally different situations. In the top panel, there's a problem because the doctor is trying to communicate with Barfo using lots of big words. The problem here is not Barfo, it's Doc Epsom. He's not doing his job and letting a patient know what's wrong with him and what he needs to do for it.

There is no problem in the bottom panel. Barfo is communicating with the chef, who understands the shorthand that's being used. To make it like the top panel, Barfo would be using that language to, say, give the diners the dinner specials. It'd be one thing if Barfo were also a doctor and couldn't understand what Epsom was saying. But this? No.

And please. The King's English? The only thing that matters is that the person being spoken to understands what's being said.

Say hi to the random spectator!

I really have nothing to say about the content of today's strip. The inclusion of the "Living on the edge" tag is worth noting. I really wish that Al would reserve it for situations where one of the people involved is clearly about to lose it and go absolutely nuts on the other person. And no, making a grown man cry does not count.

Memory like an elephant

Today's strip raises an interesting question for me. The submitter chose to be "Pul-leeze no name, no address" because he knew that his wife would read the strip and recognize herself. Now, we know that Al is very good about giving the submitter a copy of the strip. In cases like this, does the submitter get a copy? He couldn't display it or anything. Sometimes a "No Name" submitter could still get one; those are the ones where the person is whining about a neighbor. But whining about a spouse? I can't imagine that the submitter could have the strip around.

Anyway. The strip itself. I don't understand why there's something noteworthy about a husband having a bad memory and a wife having a good one. I guess we're just supposed to think, "Yes, that is frequently the way it is!" And...I guess it kind of is. In most couples I know, the woman has a better memory than the husband. So, um, good job, anonymous submitter?

Except that this is much more about a nagging wife than a woman having a good memory. She retains all of Fignewt's transgressions (and those of his stuck-up sister, who, by the way, seem to be rampant in the TDIETverse). That still has nothing to do with Fignewt having a crappy memory. It would've been better if it had been something like "Migraina never remembers when Fignewt tells her important information [picture of Fignewt bringing home the Big Boss for dinner, while Migraina has nothing prepared], but when it comes to remembering something Fignewt did wrong, heh heh, need I say more? Ohhh yeah! [bottom panel]"

What's up with the sock in the filing cabinet?

We've seen today's strip before, right? I actually thought that the Seattle Post-Intelligencer had messed up and repeated a strip. But no. Once again, it's just a case of someone insisting or being neat one place, but not another. We've seen it time and time again. The only thing that makes this even a little different is that this time, a husband is yelling at his wife! Excellent! I'm not really sure what kind of work Barfwell is referring to--cooking? I know I let my kitchen get a bit cluttered, but if I'm going to cook, then I clean up first. It's a wacky system I have.

The thing that gets me is that Mrs. Barfwell had to know that the home office was in that state--she probably watched it devolve to that point. And the second he got into it about the kitchen, she could've actually said something to shut him up instead of later just having the urge to vacuum his hide, which actually doesn't correspond to anything else in the strip--the state of the two rooms isn't one that calls for vacuuming so much as just straightening up in general.

May catch-up

In Tuesday's strip...I just don't know where to start. Quite franky, if a guy showed up to pick me up for a date and it went like that, well, it'd be a first and only date. But it seems that the girl is used to it, and really, they're going to hang out with their friends at the mall. Seems pretty tame. I guess we're supposed to be horrified at the car, clothes, and language, but I have a pretty hard time getting worked up about the language when Al includes the "It goes something like so--but like, we mean, oh, yeah-h-h-h." Honestly, he's parodying himself, right? A casual reader might think that that's supposed to mock how the kids talk; it'd be a nice argument if Al didn't use that sort of thing frequently. Favorite parts of the strip: The "Luggo Buggo" and the nice couple walking by in time to witness this horrifying act.

Yesterday's strip just baffles me. If you call out sick, then your boss probably won't call you--unless your boss is a jerk. Or you're one of those super-important types, but even then, people try to avoid calling people who are sick. Call it common courtesy. And though I can't say that I've never taken a mental health day (assuming that by "ducked work" Al means "called in sick when he wasn't), I can't feel too bad for Lugger in the bottom panel. I would say that he should just have his boss call his cell phone, except that that would mean Al includes a cell phone in a strip in a way that normal people use them. Can't have that! I do love how Mrs. Lugger was practically just copied and pasted from the top to the bottom panel--only her outfit has changed.

Today's strip finds us returning, not surprisingly, to the world of medicine, hospitals, and the numerous problems surrounding visitors--an issue Al has gone over numerous times before. The only thing I find particularly noteworthy about this strip is that submitter isn't from Florida. Quite frankly, if I were a nurse and had a patient ringing for me all time, and accompanying it with calling out like that, I probably wouldn't go running to his bedside, either. I'm happy that Al didn't do what he usually does and give the patient a bandage on his head and/or arm to indicate that yes, he does belong in a hospital. Though an IV drip might be a nice touch. Anyway, I'm debating what I think about using "Nightingales" instead of "nurses." I think I like it, actually. I believe at one point, that was fairly common.

(..."My hot wheels are rarin' t'go"? Hee hee. It's funnier if you think he's talking about a toy car.)